SUCK FACE BLOW; Secret Government Celebrity Alien Spaceship Builder Guy!
SUCK FACE
BLOW
SECRET GOVERNMENT CELEBRITY ALIEN SPACESHIP
BUILDER GUY!
A Short Fiction Series
That Is Supposed To Suck!
By
David A. Archer
02/15/1968
06/14/2007
I first started to suspect it when I saw the advertisements on television.
It isn't obvious at first, but when you put a few different commercials together, they indicate a series of directions as per how to reserve a persons place on the secret government celebrity alien spaceship.
You have to record the commercials and then put them together in a way so they can be played upside down and backwards... and of course, you have to be fluent in secret government alien language.
I had some trouble at first because, as you may already know my first language is common English of course, with the second language I am fluent in being Canadian.
I got mad when I called and they didn't have any more seats after that celebrity guy hogged them all for his friends... so, being who I am, I decided to build my own secret government celebrity alien spaceship.
I don't have any celebrities signed up yet... but I am still working on the series of advertisements to put the upside down and backwards secret language code in..... after that, I am sure they will sign up in droves.
Something else I have to figure out before things get really efficient, is how those big time guys convince people that the world is going to end and simultaneously convince them that they should have all of their paper money because, I guess, they won't be needing it when the world ends so the big time guys might as well have it.
Seems like kind of a spit ball if you ask me. What are they going to do with it if the world is going to end?
Maybe it is just an example of superior marketing skills to be able to simultaneously convince people that human existence is going to end, and that other humans should have all of their money... at least have a substantial part of it on a regular basis anyhow.
Maybe they plan on taking it with them on their secret government alien spaceship?
Maybe they will start a bank with it while they travel through space? Maybe they will bury it where ever they are going, and when they get there... dig it up and say that it is a mine?
Maybe the engine on their secret government alien spaceship is a coin operated kind of thing where they will have to keep inserting paper money bills every now and then to keep it going while they are traveling through space?
You have to admit, that would suck to be somewhere out in space and have the timer run out AND not have another money bill to put in the machine.
It does seem like kind of a spitball... but that is just another reason for me to build my own secret government celebrity alien spaceship.
Maybe I'll make mine coin operated so that I can have a change machine, too.
After all... I am Suck Face Blow and I do deserve something just a little better than the average secret government alien spaceship.

